Fisher Price™ Toys are Totally Awesome!

Written by Aleatha Moberly

Fisher Price™ "Little People™" toys are perhaps the most timelessly cool toys ever invented. Who doesn’t remember playing with those things? No one, that’s who. Here are my top three favorite sets:

Little People Farm™

This incredibly cool toy set came with a cow, a horse, a rooster, a hen, a dog, and a sheep. The dog was really weird: kind of rusty orange in color with grey spots. Ours was missing a leg because it had been chewed off by a real dog. The horse was the same rusty color, with a cylindrical head. Both ears were chewed off at some point. The horse had a plastic harness that allowed it to pull a neon orange plastic wagon. The cow was white with orange spots. Its eyes were little half-circle lines, so it looked like the cow was always asleep, even when its flat nose was touching the floor (indicating that it was eating grass). There was a sheep, and it just looked weird in general. And the rooster and hen were like plastic balls with flat tails and heads sticking out of them. There was a tractor, with a little hole in it for the farmer to sit in. The farmer’s family consisted of himself, a wife, a son with cowboy hat, and a daughter. The entire playset could be stuffed into the barn and silo. When you opened the barn door, it MOOED!

Little People Action Ramp Garage™

This was my favorite set I bet. It had some little cars for the Little People™ to ride in. The garage had three stories. At the bottom, you could drive over to an elevator. After you had safely entered your Little Person™ and his car into the elevator, you turned the crank (CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK) and the elevator carried the car up to the second story, where it could park or just drive around and generally wreak havoc, OR you could go all the way up and go to the "showroom". In the showroom there was a little circle thing on the floor that you could drive a car onto. When you turned another crank, it would spin your car around. Quite slowly. It was kind of boring. Mostly I would just (after reaching the top of the elevator) let my Little Person™ and his car proceed immediately to the ACTION RAMP™ where it would ZOOM down to the bottom story. The best part of this set was that if you had several cars, you could put them all in the elevator at once, release them onto the ACTION RAMP™, and then block the ACTION RAMP™ at the bottom, producing a serious traffic jam. No wait. The BEST part of this set was that you could accidentally smash people under the elevator! AAAAAGHGHG!!!! Too late.

Little People Castle™

This one was really big! A big huge castle complete with secret passageway, moat, flag on turret, trapdoor, and dungeon. The best thing about this one was that you could make Little People™ fall through the trapdoor, hear them CLUNK CLUNK as they bank off the walls, and fall CLUNK into the dungeon. Or you could stuff other things through it like small dinosaurs or Hotwheels™ cars. Ideally the dungeon would get stuffed, and you would have to ask your mommy to help you get all the junk out of the dungeon. Also you could crush Little People™ behind the revolving staircase, or underneath the moat bridge. One especially fun thing is that if the king exiled someone, you could put the Little Person™ on the tip of the flag, bend the flagpole downward, and then let go. TWANGANGANGANG!!!! And the Little Person™ goes flying. Never to be seen again.